Caring for a sick child in hospital is not easy. Coping styles in children vary. Leora Kuttner, PhD describes four different coping styles of children. The categories should not be used to place children in boxes, but instead can be used to provide you with an idea of where your child is at a certain time and how to talk to your child about illness.
Coping style | What type of approach should you take? |
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Catastrophizer The child collects detailed information, but it is not comforting. Instead, it exacerbates their anxiety and they imagine the worst-case scenario. The child may have had a previous negative experience related to health issues that affects their ability to cope. | Provide your child with a chance to talk about and resolve previous issues. Consider getting help for your child such as activities during playtime at the hospital or talk therapy, if the typical supports you have in place through your family do not seem to work. |
Sensitizer The child requests detailed information and searches for information. The answers seem to help them deal with feelings of anxiety. | Provide your child with information as requested. Let your child take the lead. Make sure to check in once the information has been given to make sure your child is continuing to manage the information. |
Minimizer The child downplays the information to cope with their anxiety and uncertainty, and processes information in small pieces as this is more manageable. If they are left on their own, they will come to you with questions over time as they are able to take more information in. | Be prepared to share key components but not all of the details. Provide your child with information as requested. Let your child take the lead. |
Denier The child pushes information out of their mind, does not want to think or talk about it, and may ask not to talk about it in order to protect themselves. | Provide small pieces of information. Often what children do not know can be more worrisome than what they do know. Consider getting help for your child, such as play therapy or talk therapy, if the typical supports you have in place through your family do not seem to work. |
Reference
This information is summarized from Kuttner L., A Child in Pain: How to Help, What to Do. Point Roberts, WA: Hartly & Marks; 1996.