What can I do when my child continues to misbehave when I offer support and set clear rules?
If your child continues to display the signs of a possible behavioural disorder, you can try a number of behaviour modification strategies to manage the situation.
Be clear about rules and expectations
Explain rules simply and directly so that your child or teen fully understands what is expected of them. This might mean using fewer words to justify your reasoning than you are used to.
Apply rules and expectations consistently
Children and teens are experts in finding inconsistencies. Make sure that the same plan is followed by all caregivers and teachers who have regular contact with your child.
Be clear about the values and expectations that are important to you
Have clear boundaries between behaviour that you can temporarily ignore and behaviour that you will not tolerate. For instance, sometimes it is okay to temporarily overlook poor behaviour if it is not harmful, dangerous or against family values.
Understand your child’s point of view
Often you can resolve challenging issues by carefully listening to your child’s opinions and having a calm conversation with them about some rules and expectations.
Catch your child behaving well
Notice and praise behaviours that you want to encourage. Some children can particularly benefit from a reward system to emphasize success.
Try to avoid power struggles
Instead of having a battle of wills, lay out the consequences for your child's positive or negative choices. For instance, you might warn your child that they cannot see their friend after dinner if they do not finish their homework.
Look after yourself
Dealing with any child can be frustrating and tiring. Make a point of taking breaks and finding support.
See your child’s doctor
If your child’s behaviour does not improve with these strategies at home, consider seeing your child’s doctor for an assessment. The doctor may refer you for specialized treatment such as parent training, or may recommend therapy or medications for your child or teen.
